Happily Married Widow

I came across this in one of the Facebook widow support groups I follow. At the time of writing, I've been a widow for 3 years, 7 months, and 7 days, though I'm not counting. I'm not sure why this resonated with me. Since my husband passed away, I haven't felt the slightest urge to enter into a new relationship. It's really difficult to explain this, particularly to family and friends. I've heard it all before: "You're young, you'll find someone else," or "Your husband wouldn't want you to be by yourself." Then there are those who say, "I can't imagine spending the rest of my life alone." Although most of these remarks were made with good intentions, they still hurt because it felt like no one understood how I was feeling. Before reading this, I never realized, "I am a happily married widow." This perfectly describes who I am!

As one who follows Christ, the Bible does not say that everyone is meant to be married for their entire life, nor does it forbid remarriage after the death of a spouse. Did God intend for us to all to be with a spouse? No! While marriage is a beautiful gift from God (Genesis 2:18), not everyone is called to be married their whole life. Some are single by choice, by calling, or by circumstance.

“I wish that all of you were as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God... Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do.” 1 Corinthians 7:7-8.

In this verse, Paul describes both singleness and marriage as gifts, neither is superior. What matters is how we honor God in our situation.

Is it ok for a widow to marry again? Yes! The Bible clearly permits remarriage after the death of a spouse.

“By law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law that binds her to him.” Romans 7: 2-3

“A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.” 1 Corinthians 7:39

Remarriage is fully allowed if your spouse has passed, especially when it's grounded in faith and love.

Is it ok to marry just because you don't want to be alone? God understands our human need for companionship. Wanting not to be alone isn't a sinful reason to remarry, as long as it's approached with care, faith, and the desire to honor God.

“The Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.’” Genesis 2:18

“But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.” 1 Corinthians 7:9.

In this verse Paul acknowledges that marriage can meet real emotional and physical needs, it’s not wrong to desire that, especially in a God-honoring relationship.

It is okay for a widow to say "I'm a happily married widow", especially if that phrase expresses the deep love and continued connection she feels with her late spouse. It honors the life they shared and reflects that her heart is still full of love, even after loss. So when I say I’m a happily married widow, I don’t mean my spouse is still here physically, but that I cherish the love we had. That marriage was a beautiful gift from God, and the joy of that love doesn’t die just because my spouse did. I’m grateful for what we had, and I still carry that love in my heart.

Prayer: Lord, thank You for the gift of love I shared. Though my spouse is gone, the joy and memories remain. Help me honor that love while trusting You for each new day. Fill my heart with peace and purpose. Amen